We Are Taking the Men That They Don’t Want, So What Are These American Women Mad About?

Marie Osmeña
4 min readFeb 8, 2023

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A photo during one of our singles tour at asian-women.com

I have been paying close attention to the recent trend of “Passport Bros” — American men who travel to foreign countries in search of a partner. And as someone who has been on the receiving end of judgment and hate for being an Asian woman desired by an American man, I feel compelled to address the controversy surrounding this movement.

First and foremost, let’s talk about what these “Passport Bros” are all about. Simply put, they are American men who, for various reasons, have decided to expand their dating pool beyond the borders of their home country. Whether they are seeking a change of pace, a different culture, or simply more options, they are traveling the world in search of a wife.

While I understand the concerns that some American women have about these men, I also feel that the hate and judgment directed toward them are unwarranted. Sure, some “Passport Bros” may have questionable motives for seeking a partner abroad. But the same could be said for anyone.

Don’t you think that to paint all of these men with the same brush is unfair and narrow-minded?

Love knows no borders. It’s not about nationality, ethnicity, appearance, or wealth, but rather about finding someone who accepts and loves you for who you are. And for some American men, their search for love may lead them to foreign lands.

But why are so many American women so quick to judge these “Passport Bros”? Is it because they feel like they are being “left behind” in the dating pool? Or is it because they don’t understand the very reason why their men are leaving?

I know for a fact that there can be nothing wrong with it. When a man travels, it offers the opportunity to learn about different cultures and ways of life, to broaden one’s perspective, and to grow as a person. There is also the excitement of experiencing new food, languages, and traditions–made sweeter and more memorable by a newfound lover.

Yet, many American women have put down arguments that these guys are just in it for the sex and the opportunity to manipulate a “foreign woman” to do his bidding. And while this could be true in some cases, why are they not choosing to hear the genuine sentiments of their own men? Why are the men receiving so much backlash when all they want is to be cared for and appreciated?

Being traditional doesn’t make you less of a woman.

Being a nurturing partner doesn’t make you less of a woman.

Being feminine does not strip you of your independence.

They are all refusing to do so and hate it when their men leave to find it somewhere. What boggles me is that instead of acknowledging what is wrong, they are spreading hate toward the wrong people.

Many American women who are so against the movement are also attacking the women who genuinely accepted their so-called “leftover men.” They call us poor, uneducated, and desperate who are just happy with their rejects. But if they truly believe that, why are they so angry and resentful of the men for finding wives abroad?

Another thing is that they try to put on this facade of caring for the foreign women that are being “brainwashed” by their men but all I am hearing are nothing but belittlement and prejudice.

You call us uneducated? Surprise, surprise, many Asian countries have high literacy rates.

Submissive? Most Asian culture encompasses being agreeable and hospitable to other people, especially those from other countries.

Gold-diggers and only want green cards to leave our countries? A lot of women in Asian families do make a living and would actually prefer to stay happily in our countries.

We have what your men are looking for, yet you demonized them for seeking the qualities and values that they want for a wife, for having a STANDARD. How is that fair?

Regardless of the reasons behind the hate, why not choose to embrace diversity and open our minds to the possibility of love transcending cultural boundaries? After all, love is love, no matter where it is found.

If you’re upset or frustrated with the “Passport Bros” movement, maybe it’s time you take a step back and try to understand their perspective. Who knows, you may even learn something new about yourself and what you truly want in a relationship.

And to the “Passport Bros” out there, I say this: keep searching for love with an open heart and an open mind. You never know where it may lead you.

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