How to Plan Your First Date, According to Science
First dates are always important because this is when you and the other person make your first impression of each other. It also plays a massive role in determining whether or not a relationship is possible.
But planning for a date can be nerve-wracking. You want to make sure you both have a great time. You also want to show how much you’re interested in your date.
However, you don’t want to look like you’re trying too hard for a relationship that might not even work out.
To ease your worries, here’s a list of first date tips, backed by science.
Pick a good location.
Your chosen venue sets the tone for your date, so choose a neutral, low-pressure place that lets you focus on getting to know each other and how well you connect.
For example, suggest having your date at a new coffee shop. The casual ambiance can be a comfortable space to spark an engaging conversation without buying expensive meals or having to dress fancy.
You can leave earlier if the date feels uncomfortable, but continue on if you hit it off.
Learn from your past experiences.
Instead of feeling down, focus on what you can improve from your past dating experiences.
Were you rude to your date and/or to other people?
Did you make harsh comments that were uncalled for?
Is there anything you could have done to improve these situations?
What would your previous actions indicate about you?
This is the perfect opportunity to research and adopt behaviors that will help bring out your best self — the version you want your date to see.
Make sure to put your best foot forward despite what happened in the past.
Be mindful of your body language.
This means changing your negative body language.
For example, avoid folding your arms during a conversation. Instead, lean in to show that you’re interested in hearing what your date has to say.
Look for similar behaviors to see if they are also interested in you. If their feet are facing away from you or their arms are crossed, it’s time to change the subject.
Telling your date you’re interested isn’t enough. Make sure your body language says the same thing to internalize the message.
Let your body do the talking to send a positive vibe during the date.
Prepare for an engaging conversation.
Trying to spark an engaging conversation with a stranger can be challenging if you’re an introvert or if you have social anxiety.
Here’s one tip from scientists: Drop the cheesy pick-up lines. Instead, opt for an exciting conversation starter.
Most people aren’t fond of failed attempts at humor or empty compliments. They’re more fond of those who engage in conversations that show they’re intelligent and curious.
Check how you present yourself.
This is basically your first attempt at making a good impression. Depending on the location of your date, make sure to wear the appropriate attire.
Don’t Just Leave a Good Impression, Make Sure That It Lasts
First impressions are getting more and more critical, especially in modern dating.
That makes your first date the starting point to determine whether or not you make a good pair.
But most of all, make your date as fun as possible.
Laugh at each other’s jokes and enjoy each other’s company. Don’t turn your first date into an obligatory task to take the pressure off your shoulders.