Cheating Changes Someone’s Life. Don’t Do It.

Infidelity destroys a marriage’s foundation, causing confusion, feelings of betrayal, loneliness, and heartbreak to one or both spouses. It can either break a marriage or make it more intimate and stronger.

In this article, we’ll be discussing what’s considered an affair, the different kinds of infidelity, why people choose to cheat, and how it affects marriage.

What’s Considered an Affair

Today, the definition of infidelity differs from one couple to another. For example, it can involve emotional or sexual affairs with someone outside the relationship.

Other women might call watching pornography cheating, while others might not.

Despite its implications, infidelity is harmful to a marriage, as the cheating partner is no longer focusing on their relationship.

5 Kinds of Infidelity

Each case of infidelity is different. Though knowing why your partner cheated won’t lessen the pain, being able to understand their behavior and define it will address any confusion you might have.

It’ll also help you feel more confident in coping with the situation — whether that means moving on if you decide to part ways or healing your relationship. Learn more about the different kinds of cheating and what to do if you’re in this situation.

Opportunistic Infidelity

This happens when someone is genuinely attached to their partner but succumbs to their sexual desire for another person. Usually, this is driven by drug or alcohol use, risk-taking behavior, or situational circumstances. Experts say that not every infidelity is driven by dissatisfaction with a current relationship.

Maybe they were drinking and thrown away into a situation they didn’t expect. In the end, the cheater will feel more guilty when they genuinely care for their partner.

Romantic Infidelity

This happens when the cheater has little romantic attachment to their partner. In fact, they might be committed to their relationship and making it stronger, but they long for an intimate connection with another person. That commitment can even prevent them from leaving their partners.

Romantic infidelity rarely helps in sustaining a long-term relationship. Marital issues must be challenging before either partner decides to end things for another person.

Commemorative Infidelity

This happens when someone is committed to a relationship but doesn’t have any feelings for their partner. They also don’t have any attachment or sexual desire. Most experts say that the lack of commitment and emotions for a current romantic partner are related to general feelings of relationship dissatisfaction.

These people keep telling themselves they have the right to look for what they are not getting in their current relationship. Unfulfilled sexual desires can also contribute to a person’s reason for cheating.

Conflicted Romantic Infidelity

This happens when someone feels sexual desire and genuine love for more than one person at a time. Despite the common notion about having one partner forever, it’s possible to love multiple people simultaneously.

Such situations cause a lot of stress and anxiety. In this case, cheating partners hurt everyone in their attempt not to cause anyone pain.

Obligatory Infidelity

This is driven by the fear that resisting someone’s sexual advances will result in rejection. The cheating partner might have strong attachment, love, and feelings of sexual desire for their partner, but they end up cheating since they need approval.

In addition, that need can cause them to act in ways that negate their emotions. In other words, some people cheat not because they want to, but because they need the approval that comes with having other people’s attention.

How It Affects the Uninvolved Partner

If one partner cheats for physical or emotional needs, the other partner might opt to stay in the relationship to make it work, or end it. Despite their decision, an extra-marital affair has negative consequences that can be felt for some time.

Damaged Self-Esteem

Infidelity will drastically affect the self-esteem of the partner who has been cheated on. Many victims end up blaming themselves. The choice to cheat wasn’t yours, and though you encountered problems in your relationship, you didn’t choose to cheat.

Chances are it had more to do with your partner than you.

Emotional Instability

You feel that your world has turned dark; the things that used to have meaning are now insignificant. One minute you feel like screaming, the next, crying. At first, you might blame your cheating partner, then blame yourself next.

It’s common to feel a lot of emotions when facing infidelity. Give yourself time to feel what you’re going through and work through it. Don’t hide it. If you can’t cope with it yourself, seek outside help to talk about how you’re feeling.

Broken Trust

If you’re a victim of cheating, you might find it hard to trust someone. It’s common; you might even doubt yourself and your judgment of other people. Even if you enter a new relationship, the pain of infidelity can still haunt you.

Therefore, you must deal with your excess baggage first, even if it means getting professional help. You and your future partner will be grateful that you dealt with the negative consequences of infidelity first.

Damage to Other Aspects

Infidelity can also cause you to look differently at your choices, friends, or job. This can either be negative or positive, but most victims claim that it changed all aspects of their lives. If you can help it, don’t make huge changes to your life during the emotional turmoil resulting from the affair.

Changes in Cognitive Patterns

Love is responsible for triggering feelings of euphoria and producing dopamine, and it can feel addictive to your brain. Therefore, rejection resulting from infidelity can lead to different changes in the brain pathways, similar to withdrawal in substance abuse disorder. It can also drastically affect your brain’s chemistry.

Being in love produces more dopamine and oxygen in the brain, so infidelity affects the brain’s pathways that release these chemicals.

Final Thoughts to Ponder On

Infidelity can have long-lasting effects on partners or even your children, if any. Mental health conditions like depression, chronic stress, or anxiety can result from it.

Some couples have used infidelity as a stepping stone to strengthen their relationship through therapy and with time. To move on from this phase, the two of you should work on the root cause.

Working through it might not be best for every couple, but those who are willing can heal.