REALITIES
“What are some examples of bad dating advice?”
“Don’t date outside your race or class”
Now to be fair, no one ever explicitly told me this. It was more of an unwritten rule where I am from, and in my estimation, a fairly common notion worldwide.
When I was young, I used to fall in love with the Filipino-Chinese boys in school. They were just my “type.” I am a mestiza (mixed Filipino-Caucasian features), and even though I liked the Chinitos, as we called them, we somehow understood that they rarely dated non-Chinitas. It wasn’t that they were bad people, quite the opposite. Many of them were my deepest, closest friends. Simply put, when it came to dating, it was what it was.
In this country, we have some of the loveliest, most caring people in the world. But discrimination and classism are very prevalent, but mostly hush. And it taught me and other young people that certain people were off-limits to our love.
In the end, it didn’t matter. A few years after I graduated, I managed to have two Chinito boyfriends, and while none of those relationships worked out in the end, they will always be a part of my life. Yes, it wasn’t easy to ingratiate myself with their families, but we remained civil.
Fast forward to today, and I have defied this “bad advice” totally. My husband is a white American man, who I love immensely. He is my rock, and my best friend.
I work for a lovely matchmaking company which has overseen hundreds of international marriages.
Don’t let what people say dictate who you want to date. Don’t even let any “unwritten rule,” class different, or race stop you from finding the one you love. Yes, it’s the classic story of Romeo and Juliet, but as long as people exist, barriers to love will always exist.
There will always be challenges dating someone “from the outside,” but in the end, if that person is your soulmate, then every challenge is simply a step closer to the person you love.
Source: Quora
